My name is Casey Longan and I am a woman in long term recovery. My sobriety date is September 14th, 2011. I started using at a very young age and meth was the first and only drug I ever used. I spent countless years in and out of the criminal justice system. I not only destroyed myself, but the hearts of family as well. When I left home, my family didn’t hear from me for years. The only time I would try to call was from jail. I would get out and go right back to the same people and places. Since I had isolated and removed myself from my family, I carried such shame that I felt it was better to just stay away. I felt they didn’t need or want me around because I had messed up and hurt them so bad. I never tried to get clean, I didn’t want too. This turned into a 16 year run for me. In that time, I had 2 children that I left behind with their Dad’s family because I was too busy doing drugs. Also during those years, I was raped and got pregnant. I didn’t tell or report this because of who the person was who raped me. I didn’t want any blow back from the group he was associated with. I made the choice to give the child up for adoption. There was not only the fact that I couldn’t care for the child, but I didn’t think I would ever be able to love the child because of how the baby was conceived. I wanted to give the baby a chance of a good life and that wasn’t with me.
While I was in jail for the final time, I was sentenced to treatment and was not happy about it. I had a suspended sentence of 56 months over my head if I didn’t complete treatment, so I gave it a shot, but at first this was only because I didn’t want to go to prison for that long. The treatment I went to was a 6 month program, but because of my negative attitude and breaking the rules and mouthing off to the C.O’s, I ended up with the extended stay version of 1 year in-house and 6 months of aftercare. Much too everyone’s surprise, I completed the program, without relapsing and moved into an Oxford House (sober living). I stayed 2 years in a house. I worked hard on myself and my recovery. I regained communication and relationships with my family and my children. I moved out of Oxford and came to Texas.
I started college and will be graduating in a year with a degree in criminal justice. I work for De Paul University out of Chicago as a research manager in Texas. I study Oxford Houses now for my job and love it because this is where I came from and regained my new life. I stay heavily involved as alumni of Oxford and get to work with people in recovery every day. I get to see the life and light come back into people’s eyes as they too move forward with their journey’s. I got married a year ago and could not be happier.
My life is full and happy these days. I love to help people and I love me. My life is happy and I will never stop reaching out to others to help. I feel fortunate for the life I now have and I know there are so many people out there who still need help and hope. I am NOT ashamed of where I came from. Without it, I wouldn’t be where I am today. If you’re reading this and are struggling, please know I believe in you and you can do this! It’s going to be a long road, but stick with it. Embrace the up’s and down’s and raise your hand for help. Much love!